My quotes page started to get too big so I've had to begin to subdivide. 

These are all by women and tend to be somewhat biting comments about men.

To see other lists, check the bottom of this page.

Quotations by Women

Never lend your car to anyone whom you have given birth.
          — Erma Bombeck

When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country.
          — Elayne Boosler

Women are adaptable to what the man presents to her. If he presents affection she presents affection. If he presents anger then that is what she gives back. And if he present stupidity, then she adapts to the fact that she has to do the thinking for the both of them.
         — Tina Cleland

I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night.
          — Marie Corelli

If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?
          — Linda Ellerbee

You do what you have to do, to do what you want to do. 
         — Patricia Fripp, professional speaker

Life is a series of sales situations, and the answer is no if you don't ask.
         — Patricia Fripp, professional speaker

I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.
          — Zsa Zsa Gabor

If high heels were so wonderful, men would be wearing them.
          — Sue Grafton

Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.
          — Katharine Hepburn

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy.
          — Erica Jong

He tricked me into marrying him. He told me he was pregnant.
          — Carol Leifer

I was on a date recently, and the guy took me horseback riding. That was kind of fun, until we ran out of quarters.
          — Susie Loucks

I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb . . . and I also know that I'm not blonde.
          — Dolly Parton

Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.
          — Maryon Pearson

I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch.
          — Gilda Radner

I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.
          — Roseanne

I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours.
          — Rita Rudner

The phrase "working mother" is redundant.
         — Jane Sellman

I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career.
          — Gloria Steinem

Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry.
          — Gloria Steinem

Nagging is the repetition of unpalatable truths.
          — Baroness Edith Summerskill

This guy says, "I'm perfect for you, 'cause I'm a cross between macho and a sensitive man."  I said, "Oh, a gay trucker?"
          — Judy Tenuta

In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman.
          — Margaret Thatcher

I think --- therefore I'm single.
          — Lizz Winstead

Quotation Pages On
James S. Huggins' Refrigerator Door

This page created:
before
Wed, 16.Aug.2000

Last updated:
16:45, Fri, 27.Jun.2008